Steam Power!

Steam power... Its the best. Completely changed the world. Check it out:

The first-recorded steam engine, designed in ancient Greece by a dude named "Hero of Alexandria". That's cool. It was created almost two millennia before the industrial revolution. He used the original (pictured) as a "rocket" style propulsion engine, and another to open Temple doors. All through the power of STEAM.

Around 80% of the electricity used by the entire planet is currently produced by use of steam turbines. Bam. Anything Nuclear (Submarines, bro!), also - Steam power. Here's the classic popularized steam engine:


Extra Steam, please! Steam trains are awesome. Such classic, timeless transportation. Steam Locomotives were the device "getting it done" from the start of the 19th century, until the middle of the 20th Century. A good honest run, for a good honest piece of technology.

I'd love to take a trip on the "fanciest" antique train journey I could find - like the Rocky Mountain way or the Trans-Siberian railroad, as long as the train and carriages are really luxurious and old. There'd be an "engineer" on board, with the whole getup on, and shit like that. ....Fat Controller? I dunno.

So, to summarize - Steam power. Yep. Now here's a lovely picture, just because sometimes its important to just look at a nice picture:

Flamethrowers

Flamethrowers. Real ones.

The image is of a German "Brennkommando" part of a specialty burning detachment of the German Army - destroying Warsaw during the "Planned Destruction" of the city.

I mean - when you pickup one in a video game, its great and all - but its actually a real weapon used in real-life situations... Sort of. There's lots of evidence of flamethrower-weilding footsoldiers in WWII - but its the Armoured vehicle-mounted throwers which REALLY own.

The British and Canadians fielded "The Wasp" in 1944, paving the way for the eventual "The Badger" and the "Oke", but the most famous flame tank was the "Churchill Crocodile" (Pictured).


Look the others up on Google Images.

El Toro

El Toro is a wooden rollercoaster located at the "Six Flags Great Adventure" park in New Jersey. Its the third tallest and third fastest rollercoaster in the world. That's a pretty honest effort. Its also got one of the steepest drops, at 76 degrees.

Anyways, I bothered to mention all of this, because a) Its named "El Toro" and that's the coolest name for a coaster ever. And b) Its wooden. There's something so traditionalist, old-school and just amazing about building such an epic thing, piece by piece, and out of wood. Wood is such a classy construction material.

Anyways. "El Toro" - I definitely want to ride this fucken thing.

"Wilderness"

Yeah... Wilderness. Just say it out loud, its just great. Pretty much, just places "not significantly" affected by human activity. But really, we're talking serious jungles, savannahs, rainforests, tundras, valleys, and all of the really great places in the world. Wilderness, motherfuckers.

Get out into it! .... and start affecting it with human activity.

I dunno.

"Gentleman"

The Gentleman is a timeless character throughout human history that I hope remains timeless. There is absolutely nothing unfashionable about being one of these. All of the "little details" and subtleties to the idea of a "gentleman" are works of just the most civillized genius.

Manners rule. Being neatly dressed rules. Courtesy Rules.

I hope at least a couple of people consider me one of these.

The Grim Reaper

This another one of history's "genius" legends. What a fucking badass the Grim Reaper is, man. The ONE guy who never takes any shit from anyone.... No wonder people listen to metal music - they want to have this guy on their side.

The personification of death has been told and retold in many forms - He is often portrayed as a bearded and winged man, but has also been portrayed as a young boy in Greek folklore. In Polish folklore, Death is genderless. The most popularized persona of Death, originating from Celtic folklore - is a skeleton weilding a scythe.

Nice. Check this out:


This is the cover of an 1892 issue of "Le Petit Journal". Imagine picking up your copy of the newspaper, and seeing THAT on the cover. Fuck.

Fuck - a movie about a Young boy who becomes the grim reaper would be cool as shit. Shotgun copyright on that script!

Holy Shit

Holy Shit. Imagine if this was a documentary. Good god... He's slaying two lions. Two.

By stabbing them both in the head at once.

Ghostbusters II

Hey man, so Ghostbusters.... except, number 2.

Its the sequel, but as deserving if not more deserving of its own shrine on here. Check it out: New York City has been Ghost-free for 5 years, ever since the Ghostbusters originally did battle with Gozer. After being sued by the city for property damage, the Ghostbusters are all "squeaking by" in various fields of employment. Egon is a laboratory scientist, Ray works in an Occult bookstore, Venkman hosts "World of the Psychic" on public access television, Winston works kids parties as a "Ghostbuster Entertainer". Dana (Sigourney Weaver) works at the Museum, restoring old paintings, including one particularly creepy portrait of seventeenth century tyrant "Vigo the Carpathian".


Anyways, things aren't looking good, and New Yorkers are only getting ruder and angrier. Meanwhile, the Ghostbusters' interest in all things demonic is revitalized, when Dana's baby Oscar is whisked away in his stroller by a mysterious presence. This, combined with the discovery of an enourmous river of slime below the city - signals the return of dark forces to NYC.

Now, i'll let you watch the rest for yourself, but this movie is so underrated. It plays out as a "love letter to New York City" and encourages you to believe in working together with your fellow man, loving life, and that "good vibes can save the world".

Here's something the Ghostbusters do at the climax of the movie:


Yep, they bring the Statue of Liberty to life, and walk it around the streets of NYC. Pow.

NBA Jam: Tournament Edition

NBA Jam: Tournament Edition is the best arcade game I've ever played. I'd seriously pay the $3,200 or whatever ridiculous price, just to get one of these machines in my house. I'm seriously going to do it.

Basically, since the original "NBA Jam" was so successful, they released a slightly newer one - same gameplay, but with alot more "wacky" easter eggs and cool little tidbits. Here's a video of Raiden and Reptile from the "Mortal Kombat" franchise, playing against the Charlotte Hornets.



So anyway, in these games, you'd usually just play 2-on-2 basketball using your favourite NBA team. If you managed to string together 3 consecutive baskets with one guy, your guy would become "on fire", and start shooting/dunking a flaming ball to the basket, burning its net in the process. The effect only wore off if the opposite team scored. And yeah, if you watch the video - you can get some pretty "sick" looking dunks.

Anyways, the main reason this game rules, is the adorable cheesy commentator. Along with "he's on fire!" - which relates to the above scenario, there are some freaking great lines spouted by the commentary as you play. Check this out:

"Boom-shaka-laka!"
"The Monster Jam!"
"Jams it in!"
"Slam-a-jamma!"
"From Downtown!" - when you bomb up a huge "three pointer"
"Grabs the rebound!"
"The nail in the coffin!" - in the closing moments of play.
"Whoomp, there it is!"
"Puts up a brick!" - when you miss wildly
"Can't buy a bucket!" - when you keep missing wildly
"Is it the shoes?!?" - the commentator can't come up with a better explanation as to why you're playing so good!
"Tenacious D"
"Razzle Dazzle"

Anyways, if you see this game at an arcade or pizza place or whatever. Play it. Is so fucking awesome.

"Fountain of Youth, Motherfuckers"

The Fountain of Youth is a mythical natural spring that reverses the ravages of time, for anyone who drinks from it. Tales of such a fountain have been told and retold throughout history all over the world.

The legend was popularised in the 1500's, where it is suggested that the Spanish explorer Juan Ponce de León was searching for the Fountain of Youth when he traveled to what is now Florida in 1513. I guess he had a feeling it'd just "be there" or something.

Imagine discovering it. Would you keep it a secret? I fucking would, at least to most people. Everyone would totally "interfere" with my potential immortality otherwise.

Light-years

A light-year is a unit of measurement, equal to just under 10 trillion kilometres. As defined by the International Astronomical Union, a light-year is the distance that light travels in a vacuum in one (Earth) Year.

Firstly, its "just under" 10 trillion kilometres. 10 trillion. That's hilarious.

Secondly for some probably really good reason, there is an organization called the "International Astronomical Union" (IAU). That's awesome. I'd love to be a member of that shit.

Thirdly, the closest star to the earth, not including "our" sun, is named Alpha Centauri. It is 4.3 light years away from the earth.

Fourthly, sorry about the picture. I just like pictures and wasn't sure what to use to "visually represent" a light-year. This is some gas, or something... photographed using the Hubble Space Telescope.

"Predator X"

Try this on for size. This awesome beast is the most fearsome marine creature in (pre)history. PREDATOR. X.



Predator X is thought (by scientists, not just me) to be a new species in the Pliosaur family. They excavated the skull of one of these fucking guys, in mid-2008 near the Arctic. The remains were a from a Predator X which (147 million years ago) was 15 metres long, weighed 45,000 kilograms, and had 30cm long teeth.

Experts claim Predator X to be "The most fearsome animal ever to swim in Earth's oceans." Experts put the full stop there, not me. So you know its a serious claim.

Labyrinth!

No, not the movie starring beloved rock god David Bowie - the actual thing! Labyrinths! They're basically mazes, but pretty epic ones.

The original Labyrinth, from which the name "Labyrinth" was taken was built (by legendary artificer Daedalus) in 27 Centuries BC, for King Minos of Crete. It is known as the "Palace of the Double Axe". Its function was to hold the Minotaur, a creature that was half man and half bull. Boom. I Love Minotaurs. It is said that Daedalus made the Labyrinth so cunningly that he himself could barely escape it after he built it.

Anyways, my favourite Labyrinth is the Reims Labyrinth (pictured above). It sits beneath the Cathedral of Notre Dame, in France. What's your favourite Labyrinth?

Wooden Ships

This kind of ship is best, man. Look how majestic and "supreme" this watercraft is.

Very, that's how. So yeah, ships made of wood - epic pioneering explorers, conquistadores, cartographers, tradesmen - at one point in history, going around the world in these babies. Such wonderful examples of technology (for the time) and craftsmanship (timeless). Beautiful. I would love to take a "voyage" on one someday.

Anyways, Listen to this song:

Crosby, Stills & Nash - Wooden Ships


Crosby, Stills & Nash (and Young) are cool as shit. Listen to this amazing song, these guys were right on the money. This is what a REAL supergroup does. These guys were part of The Hollies, The Byrds, Buffalo Springfield, and of course, Neil Fucking Young. This track doesn't have him on it though. The first CSN "compilation" record So Far hit the #1 spot on the US charts, so I dunno... just listen to that or something.

Anyways, if you're not already listening to CSN regularly, its probably a good idea to start.