Making An Entrance!

Making an Entrance: The theatrical term entrance, is the appearance of a character on screen or stage.

Dude, imagine being able to bring an epic level of fanfare every time you turn up anywhere. It would be so much fun to add production values to real life like that. Heavy metal theme song, fireworks, flames, lighting effects and signature taunting would be epic. Surrounded by heavily muscled roman guards. I want that every time I enter a room. Forever.

No holds barred, motherfucker. Just such a spot-on way to indtimidate 50,000 people at once. Maybe on my 60th birthday my family can buy me this as a grand entrance. Or maybe they can set it up for the day I enter prison.

Or this:

Total Badasses: CM Punk

So, a new king of modern sports entertainment has been crowned, or so it seems. I've mentioned WWE and wrestling in general (neither of the 'W's in WWE stand for wrestling anymore) - and all of my previous posts have been about the past glories of a few breakthrough WWE stars. Over the last fortnight I've been lucky enough to witness the dawn of what could be an entirely new era. The man at the helm is CM Punk. Here's him "speaking his mind" before his final PPV appearance on Sunday.



So he's just strutted out there onto the set of a live television show, and gone on a 10 minute verbatim rant about how much his boss, his colleagues and the industry are just... well, fucked. He (almost) breaks character and kayfabe about 200 times and doesn't get cut off 'til the last second. Hmmmm. Anyways, regardless of whether this was real or 'worked', it was an incredible piece of promo work. Big time. A really big deal.

So here I am, a long standing fan of Punk's - waiting to see if the WWE has pulled off an incredible on-screen acknowledgement of their mistreatment of their talent and their fans, or just let a very serious embarrasment happen at the hands of their most well-rounded performer. I'd love to let it rip on my boss like that.

For more total badasses, click here.

The Irresistible Force vs. The Immovable Object

No, not the Omnipotence Paradox.... This was dubbed the "Biggest Mainevent in Sports Entertainment". Hulk Hogan versus Andre the Giant, WrestleMania III.

It was Wrestling's peak, a peak the WWE have only just barely managed to reach a couple of times since. This was Hulkamania, the entire country (America) got behind this balding, over-the-top, spirit-of-the-80s muscleman.

The most popular and charismatic wrestler of all time, deserved the most fearsome and credible of opponents. Andre The Giant, a 7-foot, awkwardly-clumsy ogre of a man, was widely believed to be undefeatable, due to his sheer size. The marketing and build up to the event was second to none, and for the event, I think the WWF broke every attendance and pay-per-view record (at the time) by a country mile.

The match, however - hasn't quite stood the test of time as well as the "mythology" of the event. Luckily, for the most part- the quality and athleticism of wrestling matches since has evolved well past the "acting" and "storyline" elements. But, I digress.

Here's a dramatized run through of the match - pretty impressive... Especially the ending - watch the crowd lose their shit. :)

Shawn Michaels

The Heartbreak Kid. The Showstopper. Mr Wrestlemania. Shawn Michaels.

In a 20+ year career, this guy did it all. This guy performed at like 16 Wrestlemanias, and ripped the lid off of most of them, won the championship 4 times - won 2 Royal Rumbles... and none of this "oh man, look at the size of this monster who can't wrestle at all!" bullshit - the guy's probably not even 6 feet tall, and went for an hour with Bret Hart, and brought the house down in the most pure display of wrestling the WWE had ever seen. Then he did it again, and again... His matches with Chris Jericho and Kurt Angle are some of the best shit I've ever seen.

Anyways - so then WrestleMania 25 (2009) rolls around, and he decides he wants to take on the most indestructibly-booked wrestler in the history of the universe, The Undertaker. The match was a classic, incredible emotion and great work - but Shawn loses... plus, the pair make a few mistakes in the match. The crowd go ballistic anyway. One more year rolls around, and we're at WrestleMania 26... like a week ago. Shawn decides he can beat Undertaker, and tries again. They bring the house down once more, but Shawn loses. Shit.

So his match last week was his last, and I personally don't think we'll see anything like the Heartbreak Kid again. Youtube some of his shit... its phenomenal. Such a badass rockstar - like a member of Van Halen was up there kicking everyone in the face. The glam-heavy-rock movement ended in like 1996 and Shawn just kept going, winning more people over and continuing to kick total ass, without adjusting his look... like, at all. What a champion.

Would've loved to have seen more matches from Shawn Michaels - at 44 years of age, he was still outperforming 90 percent of the performers in the entire business. Salut, HBK.

Ladder Matches

Ladder matches own. They're the ultimate "test of determination" for a pro wrestler. Ladder matches generally take place between two dudes, at the end of a long series of storied bouts. The winner must retrieve the "title belt" from high above the ring, by climbing a ladder in the middle of the ring. His opponent has to try and stop him. Generally you get "really hurt" in this type of match.

Here's something historic from the more recent yesteryears of Pro Wrestling (from a TLC match, a more 'extreme' version of the Ladder match), that genuinely took my breath away.



Ouch.